Boundaries #3
Have you ever tried to change someone or wished that you could? As you probably discovered, this exercise is futile.
Laws and 2 and 3 of Boundaries go together:
The Law of Responsibility- We are responsible to each other, but not for each other.
What does it mean to be responsible to another person? Dr. Cloud explains it this way, “That is the essence of being responsible to someone, to not do for them what only they can do, and to love them by providing the help that would help them do it for themselves. Your job is to encourage, confront, empower, sometimes give resources, coach, cajole, support, or other things that help them fulfill their responsibility without doing it for them. That is the line.”
Building on this understanding, we come to the Law of Power- We have power over some things; we don’t have power over others (including changing people). Some things are within our circle of control and some are not.
Grasping these crucial ideas and discerning the difference can set you free.
Think of the one person you are tempted to want to control or save. How can you exercise good boundaries with them for their good and for your own?
Worth Repeating
Accept responsibility for your life. Know that it is you who will get you where you want to go, no one else.
-Les Brown
