Boundaries #4
Consider the inherent proactivity involved in exercising boundaries.
#4 The Law of Respect- If we wish for others to respect our boundaries, we need to respect theirs.
#5 The Law of Motivation- We must be free to say no before we can whole-heartedly say yes.
#6 The Law of Evaluation-We need to evaluate the pain our boundaries cause others.
#7 The Law of Proactivity- We take action to solve problems based on our values, wants, and needs.
#8 The Law of Envy- We will never get what we want if we focus outside our boundaries onto what others have.
#9 The Law of Activity- We need to take the initiative in setting limits rather than be passive.
#10 The Law of Exposure- We need to communicate our boundaries to each other.
This is, of course, the 7th Law. But, can you identify the intentional energy required in each of these? You decide to reflect on how you respect others boundaries (#4). You analyze and decide what to say no to (#5). You consider how your boundaries might affect others (#6). You take initiative (#9). You communicate your boundaries to others (#10).
Yes, this requires lots of energy. And, it is good energy.
As Dr. Cloud states, “Proactive people show you what they love, what they want, what they purpose, and what they stand for. These people are very different from those who are known by what they hate, what they don’t like, what they stand against, and what they will not do. While reactive victims are primarily known by their “against” stances, proactive people do not demand rights; they live them.”
What is your next right move?
Worth Repeating
The proactive approach to a mistake is to acknowledge it instantly, correct and learn from it.
-Stephen Covey
