If you are still breathing, you either have had or will have some adversity of some sort. When times get difficult, we are challenged to interpret with hope and determination.
In his book, Boundaries for Leaders, Dr. Henry Cloud elaborates on the notion of the 3 P’s. Here’s a sample:
Personalizing. In view of challenging circumstances we tend to say things like, “It’s going to be terrible. I’m going to hate this. It’s going to be awful.” We personalize the situation in a bad way.
Try this instead: “I can take this next step. I can do my best. It won’t be the end of the world.”
Pervasive. “Everything is going down the drain. Nothing we do is working, and this won’t either.”
Instead, try this: “Not everything is going bad. There are a few things going right. If it doesn’t work, it won’t mean that all is lost.”
Permanent. “It will never change. It will always be the same as it is now.”
Try this: “Keep moving and we can change this. I will figure out what the next right thing to do is and I will do it.”
The situation is what it is. The truth is that some things are frustrating and saddening. But, we hold the power of interpretation. Take 100% responsibility for your thoughts.
Be careful about all or nothing thinking. When you catch yourself over-personalizing, making sweeping, pervasively negative statements, or assuming that things will permanently be bad, push back. Challenge your own thoughts. Poke holes in your own self-talk logic. And, begin to work your thoughts back towards hope and possibility.
Worth Repeating
People find their greatest enjoyment not when they’re passively mindless, but when they’re absorbed in a mindful challenge.
-Leo Babauta
