Pushing and Prodding
If you get stuck, caught in a rut of of bad thinking, I have a tool for your toolbox. Interrogative self-questioning.
It works like this. Suppose you have a problem and you can’t figure out any way to approach it differently. The issue could be rather severe such as living with a terminal condition or caring for someone with a serious illness, owing large amounts of money, losing work, dealing with a severed relationship, or something equally dire. These types of situations happen to everyone at some point along the way and they are bad.
But, when you find yourself in the throes of self-doubt and despair and you can’t see a way through, prod your thinking with better questions.
It might look something like this:
“Can I fix this today? No. Is there some good action that I can take today? Yes. Am I the only one who has ever faced this problem? No. Have other people found a way through it? Yes. Am I alone in this? No. Do I believe that God is still with me in ways I may not understand? Yes. Am I open to receive help? Yes. Even if this takes a long time, can I continue to take the next right step? Yes. Even if the worst does happen, is there still life to live along the way? Yes. How do I do this? What do I do next? Who can I confide in or consult?”
These questions are general in nature, but you can see how you could adapt them to your conundrum.
I have been fortunate over the years to know people who face horrible illness and imminent death, yet transcend the circumstances to find the peace that enables them to offer love and grace to the people who come to watch over them. Also, I have known of people who recovered over a number of years from the worst financial setbacks. Broken friendships don’t always return, but some people work their way past the bitterness to truly find peace. Lost relationships also get mended by people who get out of the rut of bad thinking, ask better questions of themselves, and begin to create a new reality.
Just this week, I was talking with a gentleman who has had early onset Parkinson’s for about eight years. He acknowledged the blow that this dealt him early on, but then he said, “Once I got my mind right and changed the way I thought about it, I was able to live again and find joy again even with Parkinson’s.”
Interrogative self-questioning can help get you unstuck.
